I agree. Identifying the moves and never allowing the narcissist to manipulate you is the best move. However, its difficult sometimes. What if you have a narc parent and you have to stay with them (because they are aging, ailing or whatever). Is it possible to wear the shield always? sometimes narc's moves and intentions become unpredictable. We are human. We too long for love, attention, and admiration as well. living on guards is also like living in trauma. you fear what might be coming and you have to shield it.